Ok, so I went to a ladies retreat tonight at my church. I got in at the last minute, but I really was excited to go. During Praise and Worship I was singing but also praying, "Lord change me.". It's a theme I've had on my mind a lot lately. I really am hungry for God's word and longing to do His work and just become deeper in my Christianity. I have been complacent for many years. I grew up in church, was "saved" at an early age, and faith comes easily for me. I don't blame God when bad things happen, I don't doubt God's plan when things happen. But, for that reason it's hard for me to be passionate in my Christianity and my walk with Christ. It's not that I don't think that dying for ME is awesome, I just have a hard time getting really pumped about it like so many others seem to do easily.
So..... anyways back to the retreat..... after Praise and Worship the speaker (whom I have heard before and really loved) began and I pulled out my outline to follow. I am one of those who is anal about filling in blanks which she spoke and laughed about! The title for our study, I noticed, was "Change...nothing catches God by surprise". It sure caught me by surprise. I thought, "thank you Lord for providing exactly what I need". I was amazed to find out that the woman in our church who orchestrated this retreat had asked our speaker to talk about Change way back in the summer! I guess I can look at it one of two ways, either it's taken me a long time to hear God telling me I need to change or He's just been planning to let me know I need to change for a long time!
I'm not great with words and I know this is a seemingly small thing, but I was moved. I'm learning that I can become passionate for Him (and therefore change) but only if I want to and also if I pay attention to the avenues He puts in my life for me to learn.
Just something I wanted to share.
4 comments:
Hey stranger!!! how are you?!?! I found your blog through matt and sarah's. Nice to find old friends.... :) - Jessica
hey girl! i appreciated your post. it got me thinking--i guess i am the opposite. the obedience and walking the walk comes easily to me, the faith doesn't. not to say that i don't have faith--it's just always been somewhat of a struggle for me, due to unanswered questions of the world and universe and questionable contradictions in the Bible, etc. the Lord keeps me in line, though, being faithful to ME--showing up when i need Him, making things not neccessarily make sense but seem right when i need them to, answering my prayers. i pray the Lord will reveal to you what change He desires for you and that you will exuberantly follow with a peaceful and confident heart.
Also, I am sorry you were disappointed by my post on the subject of abortion. I hope you will still like and respect me as a friend regardless. I certainly understand and respect your viewpoint...I also see certain issues in black/white when, for others, there may be gray area. However, I think the point where we differ is that I do see many or probably most things as having shades of gray, and this is one of them. Now, if you go back and re-read, you'll notice that I never actually said what my personal views are; I just pointed out some facts and expressed an opinion about who should be in on the discussion. I noticed that you seemed surprised by what I said, though, so i was wondering just out of curiosity what you would have expected my viewpoint to be and why? I'm glad you're blogging!
oh my gosh, you would be surprised how many people don't talk to me anymore after we have a discussion about this. i'm glad you ain't mad at me! i am deleting all the comments on that post and responding on the person's who wrote it in order to avoid a large explosion of discussion on the topic on my board. it's just not the type of content i want discussed on my board, but i am more than happy to come over and answer questions, though. i personally have not been on birth control since justin's second year of med school when he took pharmacology and found out that it is the same as having abortions (if you believe life begins at conception). i'm glad you are passionate about matching those with unwanted pregnancies with those who are infertile. i wish those with and without children of their own who are very passionate about this would form some sort of group or alliance that girls who are considering abortion could look at--maybe they would be more willing to give up their babies? i don't know. it's more complicated than that and easier said than done, i know. what are your ideas? please post them on here!! i'll check back here in a few days.
Ok, well I learned that if you are on the birth control with both estrogen and progesterone that it prevents ovulation which means that you never have an egg fertilized and would not be an "abortion". But, if you are on the pill that only has one or the other hormones it just prevents the fertilized egg from being implanted which would be an abortion. Would be interested to hear if Justin knows about that. And, there are alliances of those who want children, they're called adoption agencies. The adoptive parents give profiles of their families and birth mothers choose which family they want to place their baby with. They can have any kind of adoption they choose; from completely open to completely closed and anywhere inbetween. I know of situations in which they contact each other regularly by phone and some in which the birth mother never wanted to know the adoptive parents' names or anything. There are also plents of websites and pregnancy help centers that can help women. Anyways, enough rambling!
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