Nana

Well, I've been distracted lately due to the sudden illness and death of my grandmother, whom I call Nana. She has been battling ovarian cancer over the past year, but the chemo was stopped a few months back and she was told her "levels" were low enough that she no longer needed the chemotherapy. In May at a regular check-up she was told that there might be a mass on her kidney. She was scheduled for a procedure to put in stints to clear a blockage that might have been causing her to have kindey infections. Two days before the procedure was scheduled she ended up in the hospital. She threw up all night long the previous night and ran a temperature of up to 105 degrees. My Pop had to carry her to the car to get her to the hospital because she had become so lethargic and weak. They said she had pneumonia and she was admitted. They transferred her to Baptist so that she would be there if they decided to go ahead with the kidney procedure.

They did put the stints in her kidneys. But, then her stomach began swelling up like it would look if a person was pregnant. They ran some scans (which they didn't read for two days!) and she was scheduled for an abdominal surgery so that they could find the blockage. They took out a good portion of her intestines and said that there were spots of cancer in her abdomen (which we later found out was extremely bad, they said it would have taken them two weeks to cut out all the cancer they saw). After the abdominal surgery she never felt any better. She was diagnosed with congestive heart failure because of the fluids building up on her heart and lungs. She was transferred to the PC ICU (which is Pulmonary Care ICU) I believe on a Sunday or Monday. I was out of town that weekend and went in on Tuesday evening, which was my first chance to get to the hospital.

I visited with my Pop in the waiting room and ate dinner with him while were were waiting on visiting hours to begin. A doctor came and found him in the waiting room and told him that he wanted to look him in they eyes and say that her condition is very serious and that she is very sick. He said that there was a strong possibility that she would not make it through this. Ten minutes later I was able to go back and visit my Nana. A family friend was also there to play her instrument for her. My nana had requested that she bring it on her next visit so that she could play it for her. So, she went back to visit my Nana as well. My pop went back out to the waiting room because there are only supposed to be two visitors at a time and my aunt and uncle had showed up in the waiting room right when visitation had started, he was going to visit with them.

Our friend quitely and sweetly played her dulcimer while I gently held and rubbed my Nana's hand. She was on an oxygen mask and every now and then would get agitated with the fit or begin breathing heavy. She did this several times while I was in there. She was "in and out of it" probably due to her medication and weak state. She began another episode of breathing heavy but this time it came on rapidly and progressed further. She looked panicky, her body stiffened, she started pulling her mask out and struggling. All of the monitors began beeping and blinking. Nurses began running in yelling to get her doctor on the line. They rushed us out and asked us to wait in the waiting room.

My friend and I had to go to the waiting room and tell my Pop that something happened. He took it in and then stood up and said he was going to go back to try to get some information. He and my aunt, who is a nurse, walked back to the unit. Soon after we heard the "code blue" for her unit. When my aunt returned she was crying and said that Nana had coded and that we should begin calling everyone and tell them that they should probably come right away. We were given a small room them soon after moved to a larger family waiting room. Family began trickling in. We were not updated much on her condition except that they shocked her and got her back and that they were working on stabilizing her. They allowed visitors after what seemed like forever, but she was sedated and was intubated. This was a Tuesday night.

Over the next couple of days she made some improvements, her oxygen levels went up enough that they were forced to turn off the ventilator and extubate her. She was never the same person. They had her on very small amounts of morphine at times, but she was not strong enough to stay awake for more than a minute or less at a time and she could not speak. She was acknowledging us speaking to her and would smile or grimace depending on the conversation and the question asked. But, her body was dying. We were waiting on my uncle to get there so that all six of her children could be by her side. After his 27 hour drive (straight through from Canada) he arrived 12 hours before she passed. He and his family got to see her and talk to her for a few hours before the night arrived. They all either slept at the hospital or in a hotel across the street. Around 4:30 am the nurses called my family and told them that she was not going to make it much longer. My Pop and her six children gathered by her side and were with her when she died peacefully and without pain. Her breathing slowed to a stop.

My Nana has always been my role model in Christianity, motherhood, marriage, and many other things. She and my Pop had an extremely close relationship. They laid side by side every night and prayed, and woke the next morning to get dressed, drink coffee, then hold hands and begin their day by praying again. She knew how to love, always put others first, and saw the positive in EVERYBODY. She never dwelt on the negative in people no matter their situation. My goal is to be more like her. She influenced many people through being "the coach's wife". She was a team mom to the Ouachita Baptist University basketball team most of her life and would have been married to my Pop for 60 years this Christmas Eve.

I love you Nana